Under the Covers with Eve - Episode 19: Porn Addiction

33:42 Under the Covers with Eve episode 19 / 34 Jan 17, 2016 12 comments 2461 365

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  • Martti45 on 2016-10-28 12:21:16 (UTC)

    I personally don't use porn that much. And when i do, it's always the solo stuff. I just love watching gorgeous women get naked :). What can i say? I LOVE women. But at the same time i find the majority of porn to be either boring or even disgustin at times. Erotic audio just gets me going way better ;). My opinion is that the hole nofap thing is a terrible thing to do to your sexuality and overall well being. Great episode, Eve.

    • A Eve on 2016-10-29 19:08:00 (UTC)

      I agree, I think it's a case of "throwing the baby out with the bathwater".

      And there's nothing wrong with loving gorgeous naked women 💋

  • josepho94 on 2016-02-25 03:27:05 (UTC)

    Eve, thank you so much for addressing this topic and give an impartial point of view. Greetings from a Colombian follower of your work on GWA and most recently this space.

    • A Eve on 2016-02-26 10:32:03 (UTC)

      Muchos gracias! 💋

  • leytod on 2016-01-27 20:09:44 (UTC)

    Great episode, Eve. I love your scholarly research and effort to discuss both sides of an issue. I don't feel so myself, but perhaps some people can only achieve arousal or sexual satisfaction from porn, which might make it a problem. I personally think that porn is a great means to see "how it works" before awkwardly trying to figure out a new position or encounter in the moment. Learning about what turns you on, what doesn't, and what you're still undecided on can't be a bad thing. And if the self-study comes with some self-pleasure and reward, so much the better.

    • A Eve on 2016-01-28 15:32:40 (UTC)

      Thank you, those are great points!

  • Jandrusel on 2016-01-19 00:18:11 (UTC)

    Really thoughtful opinions on this week's subject, Eve. It madre me think about the way I had been viewing porn, and also masturbation, for that matter.

    It goes without saying that I was one of those guys that spend days visiting NoFap and YBOP.com, trying to combat this habit that, in my eyes, was turning me into a 'zombie', as you perfectly put. To my surprise, I couldn't stay away from porn, or anything remotely erotic. Many times I cursed and begrudged myself for failing and 'relapsing' until I realized that, being sexual, is part of who I am.

    Thankfully, I never experienced the rehab symptoms that most NoFappers describe. The only think that I really struggled was guilt. Guilt of being shy around women while, in private, I was replacing the need for intimacy with porn watching. And deprecating yourself for doing so. Mentally punishing yourself this way is one of the worst things you can do. Worse than any other 'rehab symptom' you can think of.

    I still struggle from time to time but, I've realized that porn is not the problem 'per se', but rather my relationship with it. Surely, I wish someone had told me a few lessons on sexuality before discovering it, but it's too late for that. I know that there are plenty of people out there who have no problem with continuous porn watching. I'm happy for them, but I can't go back to that hole of shame and guilt. An occasional peek to a video, a racy picture, or a sexy Eraudica audio is more than enough for me.

    Bless you, Eve. It's really nice hearing a woman's perspective on this. With you, I'm learning a lot of about things I wished somebody had told me, or wished I had the courage to ask. If only I had a teacher like you in school... ;-)

    • A Eve on 2016-01-19 12:17:33 (UTC)

      Aww, my pleasure :D You're a great student :D

      (I've been trying to contact you, please email me at eves_garden@mail.com)

  • MadWithLust on 2016-01-19 00:12:11 (UTC)

    Incredibly fair and well thought out opinion! Very good points on the nuances of addiction and sex.

    Having tried Seinfeld's "contest", it is very interesting to see how much your brain really needs sex. I've tried to see how long I could go without masturbation and without porn and it is amazing how it will change your perspective. After two weeks, swimsuit models were like porn stars to me.

    And I also think sex has such powerful emotional and physiological connections, it's easy to see how it can profoundly affect someone. My first time masturbating was to porn and I remember the exact porn very fondly! Cutting out sex/porn/masturbation entirely, it is a real shock to your very sexual brain!

    • A Eve on 2016-01-19 12:16:55 (UTC)

      yes, I totally agree. Thanks MWL!

  • JJJ on 2016-01-18 20:17:08 (UTC)

    Thumbs up for this episode, and the site update.
    Good works as always Eve.

    • A Eve on 2016-01-18 21:45:28 (UTC)

      Thank you! ❤️